This year at my university we have been ask to reflect on how we learn English, specifically how we add words to our vocabulary. Most of the time this includes making lists that you have to repeat several times, which can get a little tedious or grating over time. When that happens, you can lose track of why you became so passionate about the language in the first place and you need to renew it.
For me, the best way is to go and look for completely obscure parts of the language, those special tiny places that most people don’t notice and are not even particularly relevant to anything you might be currently doing, but are just interesting and funny.
So I decided to celebrate the passion for words by listing my top 10 obscure words of the English language, the definition, and a little bit of what I think of them. So here it goes:
1. Defenestration (def.: the act of throwing someone or something out of a window)
Want to sound threatening yet sophisticated? This is the word for you! Just the fact that this words exist says something about our society. I’m not sure what, but it certainly does! Nevertheless, this is still a great word to know. Not because you could use it every day, but because when something like that does happen, you’ll know exactly how to describe it. The only sad thing about this is that it’s doesn’t appear in political reports often enough.
2. Pulchritudinous (def.: used of persons only; having great physical beauty)
What demon from hell thought this was a good idea? Telling someone they’re pretty hard enough without having to twist your tongue in a butterfly knot. If you really want to convince someone you’re good at French kissing there are surely more practical ways to do it so they won’t wonder if they have a serious medical condition.
3. Lackadaisical (def.: idle or indolent especially in a dreamy way)
I haven’t learned this word soon enough! This should be in the active vocabulary of any chronic daydreamer. It’s the perfect word to use as a retort when someone accuses you of not paying enough attention. It’s correct, yet it also makes you sound smart enough not to be labeled as lazy. It’s a win-win situation… but your mom will still want you to do the dishes.
4. Arachibutyrophobia (def.: the fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of one's mouth )
I’m sure that this is a serious issue for some people, but that doesn’t make it any more obscure. It’s just such an oddly specific fear to have. Still, I also think that it must be one of the easiest fears to avoid, given you’re not a peanut butter addict.
5. Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia (def.: the fear of long words)
Also great evidence that the people devising the English language are all secretly sadists (as if the spelling didn’t give it away). Well, to be fair it derives mostly from Latin, but you’d think that the language that turned ‘ananas’ into ‘pineapple’ wouldn’t have issue with taking artistic liberties every once in a while. How do people with this phobia even name their condition? Part of me imagines them going to a therapist and saying: “I have… I have… I have that which must not be named…”
6. O-O (def.: a honeyeater (bird) found in Hawaii, now probably extinct, which had a thin curved bill and climbed about on tree trunks.)
This probably has roots in the old Hawaiian language, but that doesn’t mean that I won’t crack jokes at it. Did God get drunk one night, made this bird and then went ‘oh-oh’? Were the people that first saw this bird so awe-struck that they could only name it after the face they made (O-O)? Did they name it that because someone who killed the last one just went ‘oh-oh’? Too soon?
7. Pre-loved (def.: second-hand)
I’m not including this word because it would be so obscure, but just because it’s so… perfect. What an incredibly adorable way to say your dress or your teddy bear were owned by other people before you. Still, I wouldn’t really use it when it comes to other things like kitchen appliances. “So you got a new dishwasher?” “No, it’s pre-loved.”
8. Petcock (def.: a small valve positioned in the pipe of a steam boiler or cylinder of a steam engine for drainage or testing)
Nope, this word doesn’t describe a pet rooster or a very specific kink. It’s also one of the words that illustrate the need for interlingual translators the most. Would you trust a 18-year-old intern to properly translate this?
9. Callipygian (def.: having well-shaped buttocks)
Now, here’s a word that is not what the language deserves, but what it needs! Commenting on someone’s back-side has never sounded more intellectual. Granted, most people probably won’t understand what you mean, but that makes it even better. Let’s face it; who doesn’t appreciate a nice set of buns? It really does deserve a word of its own.
10. Criticaster (def.: a minor or inferior critic)
I guess today this would be known as a ‘hater’, but this word is evidence that they probably existed way back in the 17th century.
